Is it possible he really forgot?
It’s been twenty years. I’m the one who was traumatized. I’m the one who said nothing. Did nothing.
Well, that’s not really accurate.
I buried it. Allegedly got over it and got on with it. Honestly, I tucked it away from sight, but it was never very far. I carried it with me into each new year. Into every new relationship. It colored every subsequent encounter. Every single one.
So it leads me to wonder: is it possible for someone to inflict such harm upon another and not recognize it as such?
Apparently it is.
Interestingly, I don’t need anything for me. I had resolution about it a couple of years ago when I did some storytelling around it. Now I feel it’s important for him to realize how it impacted me so that maybe he can teach his son better. He may or may not take or understand that, but that’s on him.
I think it is possible, and possibly quite common.
Especially since our culture empowers men to feel entitled to take what they want and I’m not sure how effective we are at teaching them about boundaries.
Girl. Smh. I’ve initiated a dialogue of sorts. He asked me for clarification on what I’m talking about. Today I elaborated. Not sure where this is going.
It’s good that there’s a conversation happening. You’re brave to initiate it. I hope it gives you what you need.
The convo has ended. It was an interesting process.